What Would YOU Do?

     I’m probably like many of you: I watch the evening news on television.  I see the same things that are happening in this country and in other places around the world.  I often think: “How can things get any worse?”  And yet when I watch the news the next evening I find myself saying: “It did get worse!”  I hope and pray that if you are reading this blog these terrible things that I watch each night are NOT happening to you.  But if they are I have to feel a terrible remorse that you may be suffering these atrocities.  But if they ARE NOT happening to you, I’m very thankful, but I want you to consider for just a moment if they WERE happening to you: What would you do?

    You could sit around waiting for someone to come to your assistance.  And today there are many organizations and individuals who respond almost instantly to the need of others.  It is extremely heartwarming to know that we can be part of such a fantastic service to those in need.  I’ve heard about them and so have you:  Those individuals who are not seeking any recognition or payback or often even a simple “thank you.”  But they were there when the assistance was needed and they did not hesitate to “jump in” and commit to the efforts that it took to help.  Often, and you may know some personally, who are NEVER recognized widely for their efforts.  Some are total strangers who happened to be walking by or driving by when the situation called for action.  They were there and their hearts compelled them to extend compassion and empathy.  They didn’t think about the person’s education level, or their economic status, or the color of their skin, or their nationality or religious upbringing.  They saw another fellow human in need and they took action.  And times are when these are not high-charged, “life or death” situations but only an opportunity to show fellow filling and concern.

    Some actions are taken on a daily basis and never reach the national level of review by millions on the evening news, but are only known by the person who is affected by the actions of others and who may never be in a position to repay those kind actions in any fashion, but who will always hold a special place in their hearts for all that was done for them.

     Consider:  the person who pays for your order while you wait in the drive thru line.  Or that person in the grocery line who covers those “few extra dollars” because you were short in your payment.  Think of that police officer who pays for a lady’s diapers for her baby because she had no money.  Even the person who gives you their seat on the bus and then they stand for the entire ride.  Maybe it’s those “little things” that you almost never take notice of: Someone holding the door while you enter or exit a building.  Or maybe someone who pauses in the street so you can back out of a parking space.  It may only be a gesture of those old words of kindness, “Please” and “Thank You” that you haven’t heard in a long time.  Or maybe just an appreciative thought of letting you know that you are appreciated.  When was the last time you received a hand-written note from a close personal friend that simply stated: Just thinking of you?  Maybe the more important question might be: When was the last time YOU SENT such a card to one of your close friends?

     And there are so many other such situations and occasions of this type that could be mentioned.  However, my thought is: What would YOU do?  I pray that you, my dear reader, are NEVER in a desperate situation of need.  But please think about how you could be the giver of such support and sharer of such human compassion.  Think today how you could be the uplifting moment in someone’s life.  And if it is within your means to do so, please do not hesitate to do it!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Plan for the BEST ---

Expect the WORSE ---

then live with what you get!"

Stress

     “The struggle to balance work, family, and outside commitments has intensified in recent years.”  So says a recent book on family life.  Yes, we live in stressful times.  Are you under stress, perhaps because of conditions on your job?  Suffering in silence may only make you feel more pressured.  Researchers on stress in the workplace recommend “talking to your employer: if they don’t know there’s a problem, they can’t help.”  This doesn’t mean venting rage and frustration.  Be calm.  Be businesslike and avoid a confrontational approach.  Perhaps you can convince your employer that less job stress will mean more productivity.

     The same can be said for other work-related problems, such as tensions and conflicts with workmates.  Look for productive ways to confront such problems, perhaps doing research if necessary.  A number of articles have been published that might prove helpful.  If the situation seems beyond salvaging, it may be best to consider changing employment.

     Stress in everyday terms, is a feeling that people have when they are overloaded and struggling to cope with demands.  These demands can be related to finances, work, relationships, and other situations, but anything that poses a real or perceived challenge or threat to a person’s well-being can cause stress.

     Stress can be a motivator.  It can be essential to survival.  The “fight-or-flight” mechanism can tell us when and how to respond to danger.  However, if this mechanism is triggered too easily, or when there are too many stressors at one time, it can undermine a person’s mental and physical health and become harmful.

     According to the American Psychological Association’s (APAs) annual stress survey, average stress levels in the United States rose from 4.9 to 5.1 on a scale from 1 to 10 in 2015.  The main reasons given are employment and money.

     These are NOT the ONLY situations that you may find stressful.  But WHAT is stress?  How can we recognize it in our lives?

     Stress is the body’s natural defense against predators and danger.  It flushes the body with hormones to prepare systems to evade or confront danger.  When we are faced with a challenge, part of our response is physical.  The body activates resources to protect us by preparing us either to stay and fight or to get away as fast as possible.

     The body produces larger quantities of the chemicals cortisol, adrenaline, and noradrenalin.  These trigger an increased heart rate, heightened muscle preparedness, sweating, and alertness.  All these factors improve the ability to respond to a hazardous or challenging situation.

     Factors of the environment that trigger this reaction are called stressors.  Examples include noises, aggressive behavior, a speeding car, scary moments in movies, or even going out on a first date.  The more stressors we experience, the more stressed we tend to feel.

Changes to the body

     Stress slows normal bodily functions, such as the digestive and immune systems.  All resources can then be concentrated on rapid breathing, blood flow, alertness, and muscle use.  The body changes in the following ways during stress:

·        Blood pressure and pulse rate rise

·        Breathing is faster

·        The digestive system slows down

·        Immune activity decreases

·        The muscles become tense

·        A heightened state of alertness prevents sleep

     How we react to a difficult situation will affect how stress affects us and our health.  A person who feels they do not have enough resources to cope will be more likely to have a stronger reaction, and one that can trigger health problems.

     Stressors affect individuals in different ways.  Some experiences that are generally considered positive can lead to stress, such as having a baby, going on a trip, moving to a nicer house, and being promoted.  This is because they often involve a major change, extra effort, new responsibilities, and a need for adaptation.  They are also steps into the unknown.  The person wonders if they will be able to cope.

      A persistently negative response to challenges can have a detrimental effect on health and happiness.  However, being aware of how you react to stressors can help reduce the negative feelings and effects of stress, and to manage it more effectively.

     Physical effects of stress on the body can include:  sweating, pain in the back or chest, cramps or muscle spasms, erectile dysfunction and loss of libido, fainting, headache, heart disease, high blood pressure, lower immunity against diseases, muscular aches, nervous twitches, pins and needles, sleeping difficulties, or stomach upset.

     A 2012 study suggested that the stressors experienced by parents, such as financial troubles or managing a single-parent household, can lead to obesity in their children.

     Emotional reactions can include:  anger, anxiety, burnout, concentration issues, depression, fatique, a feeling of insecurity, forgetfulness, irritability, nail biting, restlessness or sadness.

    Behaviors linked to stress include:  food cravings and eating too much or too little, sudden angry outbursts, drug and alcohol abuse, higher tobacco consumption, social withdrawals, frequent crying or relationship problems.

     We all react differently to stressful situations.  What is stressful to one person may not be stressful to another.  Almost anything can cause stress.  For some people, just thinking about something, even if it is an extremely small thing, can cause stress.

     Common major life events that can trigger stress include:  job issues or retirement, lack of time or money, bereavement, family problems, illness, moving home, even relationships, marriage and divorce.

     Other commonly reported causes of stress are:  abortion or miscarriage, driving in heavy traffic or fear of an accident, fear of crime or problems with neighbors, pregnancy and becoming a parent, excessive noise, overcrowding, and pollution, and uncertainty or waiting for an important outcome.

     Some situations will affect some people and not others.  Past experience can impact how a person will react.  Sometimes, there is NO identifiable cause.  Mental health issues, such as depression, or an accumulated sense of frustration and anxiety, can make some people feel stressed more easily than others.

     Some people experience ongoing stress after a traumatic event, such as an accident or some kind of abuse.  This is known as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) Those who work in stressful jobs, such as the military or the emergency services, will have a debriefing session following a major incident, and they will be monitored for PTSD.

     A doctor will normally diagnose stress by asking the patient about symptoms and life events.  Diagnosis is complex.  It depends on many factors.  Questionnaires, biochemical measures, and physiological techniques have been used, but these may not be objective or effective.  The most direct way to diagnose stress and its effects on a person is through a comprehensive, stress-oriented, face-to-face interview.  Treatment includes self-help, stress management, and medication.

     Here are a few steps you can take to manage or prevent the feeling of being overwhelmed.

1.      Exercise:  Studies have shown that exercise can benefit a person’s mental and physical state.

2.     Reducing intake of alcohol, drugs, and caffeine:  These substances will not help prevent stress, and they can make it worse.  They should be cut out or reduced.

3.     Nutrition:  A healthy, balanced diet with plenty of fruit and vegetables helps maintain the immune system at times of stress.  A poor diet will lead to ill health and additional stress.

4.     Prioritizing:  Spend a little time organizing your to-do list to see what is most important.  Then focus on what you have completed or accomplished for the day, rather than what you are yet to finish.

5.     Time:  Set aside some time each day just for yourself.  Use it to organize your life, relax, and pursue your own interests.

6.     Breathing and relaxation:  Meditation, massage, and yoga can help.  Breathing and relaxation techniques can slow down the system and help you relax.  Breathing is also a central part of mindfulness meditation.

7.     Talking:  Talking to family, friends, work colleagues, and your boss about your thoughts and worries will help you “let off steam.”  You may be comforted to find that you are “not the only one.”  You may even find there is an easy solution that you had not thought of.

8.     Acknowledging the signs:  A person can be so anxious about the problem that is causing the stress that they do not notice the effects on their body.

9.     Find your own disstressor:  Most people have something that helps them, relax, such as reading a book, going for a walk, listening to music, or spending time with a friend or a pet.  Joining a choir or a gym helps some people.

10.     Establishing support networks:  The APA encourages people to develop networks of social support, for example, by talking to neighbors and others in the local community, or joining a club, charity, or religious organization.

     Even if you are not feeling stressed NOW, being part of a group can prevent stress from developing and provide support and practical help when hard times come.

     Online social networking can help, as long as it does not replace face-to-face contact.  It can allow you to stay in touch with friends and family who are far away, and this can reduce anxiety.

     If the stress is affecting your daily life, you should seek professional help.  A doctor or psychiatric specialist can often help, for example, through stress management training.

     Stress management can help you to:         

·        Remove or change the source of stress

·        Alter the way you view a stressful event

·        Lower the impact that stress might have on your body

·        Learn alternative ways of coping

     Stress management therapy pursues one or more of these approaches.

  

     Techniques for stress management can be gained from self-help books, online resources, or by attending a stress management course.  A counselor or phychotherapist can put you in touch with personal development courses, or individual or group therapy sessions.

     Therapies that may help you relax include aromatherapy or reflexology.

     Some insurance providers cover this type of treatment, but not all.  You will need to check with your own carrier.

     Doctors will not usually prescribe medications for coping with stress, unless the patient has an underlying illness, such as depression or a type of anxiety.  In that case, the doctor is treating a mental illness and not the stress.

     In such cases, an antidepressant may be prescribed.  However, there is a risk that the medication will only mask the stress, rather than help you deal and cope with it.  Antidepressants can also have adverse effects.

     Developing some coping strategies before stress hits can help you manage new situations and maintain your physical and mental health.  If you are already experience overwhelming stress, seek medical help

     I am NOT a doctor and don’t intend to be giving anyone medical advice about stress.  I’ve just provided some information that may be helpful to some.

    I can assure you, although it was not mentioned in this blog, that writing a blog on a regular basis can also be very stressful.  Maybe I’d better re-read the information I posted here and see if I can help myself

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Sometimes we look at others and think:

'How Strange!'

Get a mirror"

A Journey

     I sit at my desk and let my mind wonder.  Where will it take me?  How long will I be gone?  I don’t really know the answer to these questions:  At least not at this point in time.  But as I am lost in my thoughts have I dreamed a dream?  Or did I receive a vision?  These questions too I am unable to answer.  All I know is that during the time of my pondering until my return to this point in time hours have passed.  And yet it also seems that days have passed.

     In the “other” place I conceived that the world had solved its problem of hatred.  All men (and women) were able to live in peace and harmony.  It seems like the words of the song sung by Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder were true.  We could live in perfect harmony like the keys on a piano (Ebony and Ivory).  While I was away on my journey I saw there was no need for border patrols, passports, or other restrictive devices formed by various governments today.  There was only ONE government over the entire earth.  No boundaries to keep people from going wherever they desired to go.  And they were warmly welcomed as they traveled about the globe.

     I saw too in this “other” place there was no poverty, race or class distinctions, just peace, love, and tranquility.  All people had the things they needed to live in a physically and mentally safe and secure location.  No one had too much and no one had too little.  And what was available was made proportionately available to all.  I saw no sickness because all of mankind had access to the medical advances in any country.  And there were no fees, tariffs, taxes or other financial restrictions placed on the recipients getting whatever medical treatment they may need. In fact, there was no need for money at all.  It didn’t even exist in this place.

     I heard voices of many children laughing as they played together in the streets and vacant lots of the city.  They were from all races and backgrounds.  No one was making them afraid.  No one posed a physical or sexual threat to them.  There was only the desire to make their lives as pleasant as possible.  There was also an enjoyment for the children to assemble together to receive education and training in how to live a well productive life.

     I saw also the “older” ones in the community.  They were shown the respect and dignity that was due them as mature members of the community.  My eyes watched them in amazement as with each passing day they were actually becoming younger in appearance and more vitalized in energy.  Their maladies were also being done away with.  I saw the blind able to once again see.  They were describing the marvelous things that their eyes were now able to visualize.  I saw the lame stand up on firm limbs and begin running around in great joy.  Now joining the children in their street games, they were really giving them a “run for their money!”  I could almost not believe what my eyes were seeing, but there were those with missing limbs and other deformities now becoming “whole” in their physical appearance.  I almost became overwhelmed by the things that were going on around me.  Was this all a dream?  Was this all a vision?  I still do not know the answer to these questions.

     But when I returned from the “other” place I almost felt sadness within myself. Now as I sit at my desk trying to put into words just a fraction of what I had seen I am caught in the realization that my present world is not anything like the “other” place.  I only wish that I could physical visit that place and find a way to stay there and never have to return to the present reality.

     Was what had happened to me a dream or a vision?  Who can say for certain? Perhaps I had the privilege of seeing within my minds’ eye things that could be!  Or better yet, maybe I got a glimpse of the way things WILL be!  In either case I saw that despite the present conditions there is a hope for the future.  A hope that can show us how to live the real life intended for us from the beginning of creation.  Perhaps it was a glimpse into the future: a future of which each individual must decide if they want to become part of.

     Was it only a matter of the passing of a few hours or was it actually a journey of several days?  I cannot answer for sure.  But I can state this:  As I conclude this writing and place my pen back in its holder, I am going to see if I can make the trip back to the “other” place once again.  And hopefully this time I can stay for months in that paradise.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Why is it: When ALL else fails - - - 

We turn to God?"

Patience

     What is one of the most valuable commodities that anyone can possess in this day and age?  What is the one precious thing we all seem to lack?  I believe that, given the opportunity, some of us would even trade everything for a lifelong supply of this magical substance.  It is the one thing that can secure so much happiness, inner peace, and long-term fulfillment.  It’s called PATIENCE!

    The word patience is defined as: The ability to wait calmly for something to happen without complaining or giving up.  So how long must our problem solving minds be silent before we’re considered patient?  And also what can we possibly hope to learn from being patient?

     After participating in many forms of competitive competitions you learn that your greatest weaknesses can be exposed.  In one-on-one situations you have to be able to fight through the problems that get in your way.  Just who is that enemy that gets in your way of what you want to do?  Is it a family member, a friend, a co-worker, or the biggest foe of all --- YOU?  I have seen many great people fail because of themselves.  They want it all RIGHT NOW and don’t realize that experience and time are allies.

     Imagine the possibilities of having no more bumpy roads along in your life.  There will be less bad decisions, regrets, misunderstandings, impulsive assumptions, reckless behavior or jumping to ridiculous conclusions.  No more sleepless nights.  With true patience you will find it so easy to peacefully wait your turn; we will be able to make the right decisions at the right time.

     Over the years, I have seen how a lack of patience, uncontrolled emotions and rash actions can crush dreams, destroy lives and wreak havoc in whatever people do!  Patience is the antidote to the restless poison of the ego.  Without it we all become ego-maniacal, destroying our future happiness, as we blindly rush in.  In these out-of-control moments, we bulldoze through the best possible outcomes for our situations, within a matter of minutes, only to return to the scene of the truth in our heads:  BIG mistake!  Then the process of picking up the pieces begins, trying in vain to salvage what may be left of the opportunities and future prospects we have now annihilated.  More often than not the damage simply cannot be undone.  How many times have I heard the sad words: “If I had only listened to your advice?”  It’s a lesson we have all struggled with and hopefully grow from!

     Have you been called impatient when you do things? Someone who is impatient helps to create: fear, anxiety, and failure.  While patience helps promote: tolerance, composure, serenity, and restraint.  All of these traits help to promote a good mental outlook.

“Patience is a virtue”

     People usually say this when someone they know is being impatient, or is at least tempted to be.  Or perhaps we occasionally say this to ourselves, in times that try our patience.  But WHY is patience a virtue?  There is a lot to say about this, but one reason that patience is a virtue is that it is a means of connecting members of a family or community together in deeper ways.

     When a parent is habitually impatient with a child, when children are constantly impatient with aged and infirm parents, when people are dismissive of their colleagues and uncaring of their subordinates, when neighbors are indifferent to the plight of the lonely and handicapped who live on their street --- in these and innumerable other ways we create “displaced” persons in a tranquil and affluent land.

     It strikes me that as a society we are impatient with the aged, when we are behind them in traffic, waiting for them to finish their transaction at the supermarket line, and in a variety of other circumstances.  Perhaps now that I’m shifting into that area, I am more sensitive to this because what used to seem far off on the horizon – old age --- is now becoming a reality and I don’t want to be pushed to the margins or the target of anger born from impatience.  More importantly, as I come to appreciate in deeper ways the value of each individual human being, I see that we tend to disregard the need for patience in our dealings with the old and the very young.

     Community of this type is fading in many ways due to technology, individualism, and a general lack of planting ourselves in one place for life.  We have to be more intentional about forming such communities given some of the additional challenges we face.  However, one way to accomplish this is to seek to cultivate and display patience with ourselves, those we share a home with, and those we encounter as we go about our days in whatever places we find ourselves.

     We’ll have to accept the reality of life that not all we aspire to will be given to us instantly.  We need to sacrifice and wait.  Things come at the most appropriate time and opportunity.  If we have the patience to wait, that opportunity will be given to us just as we need it.  But then if we don’t wait, we become desperate and we lose hope, thus losing the opportunity in the end.  Accomplishments and success are much more appreciated and valued if we invest time into them.  If we want to achieve something, we need to work hard for it and not just rush things just to have it.  Life is just like a well-baked cake.  It needs the proper mixture of ingredients and enough time for baking.  If life is half-baked, it is never interesting nor fulfilling.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"People may learn more about you than you want

if you loose your temper."

Why Do We Fall Down?

     If you have been reading my blog you might remember that I really enjoy baseball.  In considering that sport, a batter is measured as successful according to his batting average.  If you had a player with a 300 battering average he would be playing REALLY well.  That would mean he would be successfully hitting the ball three out of ten times at bat.  However it would also mean that 7 times he FAILED to hit the ball.  But, in perspective he would be extremely successful.  How could he accomplish a successful career if he constantly concentrated on his failures?  He would USE these failures to motivate himself to move forward and reach out for those opportunities where he would be successful.  We should apply this principle within ALL areas of our lives.  Regardless of the area of one’s expertise we will find people who are successful because they are not afraid of failure.  They know that within the “averages” of the numbers they are going to succeed within time IF they do not tire out and give up!  Consider a few examples:     

     Winston Churchill repeated a grade during elementary school and, when he entered Harrow, was placed in the lowest division of the lowest class.  Later, he twice failed the entrance exam to the Royal Military Academy at Sandhurst.  He was defeated in his first effort to serve in Parliament.  He became Prime Minister at the age of 62.  He later wrote: “Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never – in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense.  Never, Never, Never, Never give up.”      

     Confucius said: “Our greatest glory is, not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail.”

     Thomas Edison’s teachers said he was “too stupid to learn anything.”  He was fired from his first two jobs for being “non-productive.”  As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb.  When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied: “I didn’t fail 1,000 times.  The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

     Albert Einstein did not speak until he was 4-years-old and did not read until he was 7.  His parents thought he was “sub-normal,” and one of his teachers described him as “mentally slow, unsociable, and adrift forever in foolish dreams.”  He was expelled from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School.  He did eventually learn to speak and read.  Even to do a LITTLE MATH.

     Louis Pasteur was only a mediocre pupil in undergraduate studies and ranked 15^th out of 22 students in chemistry.  In 1872, Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, wrote that “Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.”

     Henry Ford failed and went broke FIVE times before he succeeded.  On one occasion Ford stated: “Failure provides the opportunity to begin again, more intelligently.”

     Fred Smith, the founder of Federal Express, received a “C” on his college paper detailing his idea for a reliable overnight delivery service.  His professor at Yale told him: “Well, Fred, the concept is interesting and well formed, but in order to earn better than a “C” grade, your ideas also have to be feasible.”

     When Bell Telephone was struggling to get started, its owners offered all their rights to Western Union for $100,000.  The offer was disdainfully rejected with the pronouncement, “What use could this company make of an electrical toy?”

     Robert F Kennedy stated: “Only those who dare to fail greatly can achieve greatly.”

     Rocket scientist Robert Goddard found his ideas bitterly rejected by his scientific peers on the grounds that rocket propulsion would not work in the rarefied atmosphere of outer space.

    Basketball great Michael Jordan stated: “’I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career.  I’ve lost almost 300 games.  26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot --- and missed!  I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life.  That is why I succeed.”

     Bobby Jones, golf legend, said: “I never learned a thing from a tournament I won.”

     Walt Disney was fired by a newspaper editor because “he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.”  He went bankrupt several times before he built Disneyland.  In fact, the proposed park was rejected by the City of Anaheim on the grounds that it would only attract riffraff.”

     After his first audition, Sidney Poitier was told by the casting director, “Why don’t you stop wasting people’s time and go out and become a dishwasher or something?”  It was at that moment, recalls Poitier, that he decided to devote his life to acting.

     In 1944, Emmeline Snively, director of the Blue Book Modeling Agency, told modeling hopeful Norma Jean Baker “You’d better learn secretarial work or else get married.”  I’m sure you know that Norma Jean became known as Marilyn Monroe.  Now - - - who was Emmeline Snively?

     After Harrison Ford’s first performance as a hotel bellhop in the film Dead Heat on a Merry-Go-Round, the studio vice-president called him in to his office.  “Sit down kid,” the studio head said, “I want to tell you a story.  The first time Tony Curtis was ever in a movie he delivered a bag of groceries.  We took one look at him and knew he was a movie star.”  Ford replied, “I thought you were supposed to think that he was a grocery delivery boy?” The vice-president dismissed Ford with “You ain’t got it kid, you ain’t got it --- now get out of here.”

     In high school, actor and comic Robin Williams was voted “Least Likely to Succeed.”

     Decca Records turned down a recording contract with the Beatles with the unprophetic evaluation, “We don’t like their sound.  Groups of guitars are on their way out.”  After Decca rejected the Beatles, Columbia records followed suit.

     In 1954, Jimmy Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, fired Elvis Presley after one performance.  He told Presley, “You ain’t goin’ nowhere, son.  You ought to go back to drivin’ a truck.”

     Van Gogh sold only ONE painting during his life.  And this was to the sister of one of his friends for 400 francs (approximately $50 US at the time.)  This didn’t stop him from completing over 800 paintings.

     When Pablo Casais reached 95, a young reporter asked him, “Mr. Casais, you are 95 and the greatest cellist that ever lived.  Why do you still practice six hours a day?”  Mr. Casais answered, “Because I think I’m making progress.”

     12 publishers rejected J.K. Rowling’s book about a boy wizard before a small London house picked up Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone.

     18 publishers turned down Richard Bach’s story about a “soaring eagle.”  Macmillan finally published Jonathan Livingston Seagull in 1970.  By 1975 it had sold more than 7 million copies in the U.S. alone!

     There is a professor at MIT who offers a course on failure.  He does that, he says, because failure is a far more common experience than success.  An interviewer once asked him if anybody ever FAILED the course on failure.  He thought for a moment and replied, “No, but there were two incompletes.”

     With a little effort I think you can see my point.  Why do we fall down?  So we can get up again and move forward.  There are more things in this world that will put obstacles in your path of success than you can begin to imagine.  What we need to do is learn from our mistakes.  Take a realistic review of ourselves and move on to success.  Also, we can become the obstacles for others.  Instead, let’s make efforts to be a support of reassurance to those around us.  Don’t make yourself a stumbling block, but become a stepping stone.  Remember the baseball player.  If three out of ten swings are successful with each swing you bring yourself closer to a “hit” KEEP SWINGING!

     May we have the attitude as expressed by Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings in The Yearling:  “Life knocks a man down and he gits up and it knocks him down again… What’s he to do when he gits knocked down?  Why, take it for his share and go on.”

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Consider ALL challenges a chance to grow as a person."

Why Can't It Happen?

     If you’ve lived long enough and even if you haven’t lived very long, you’ve seen it happen over and over again.  There can be a fierce and deadly war raging in a certain area and maybe it’s been going on for years.  Then you will see both sides willing to set a “day” aside and “cease fire” for the period.  If they can decide to do that for a certain day, why can’t they decide to do it for ONE more day?  And then one more!  And then one more!  And if that can be done why can’t they decide to stop fighting all together?  They could just make the decision to resolve the fact that there’s just no really good reason to keep fighting at all!  But in most cases the hatred continues to be perpetuated by both sides so that the fighting continues.

     Probably the BEST example of this involves the Hatfields and McCoys.  There may be some of you reading this blog who have NO idea who I am talking about.  But just do a little research and you will find out these families feuded beginning in the late 1800s and it went on for decades.  And the actual reason for its start is still debated by many.  Was it a love relationship, a dispute over land, or the killing of some family members or could it have started over something as simple as a PIG?  Many have their reasons for believing the way they do, but the debate will probably continue for many years to come.  Even today just the mention of the family names brings to mind the picture of a ruthless conflict between two opposing sides.

     Looking into the areas of hatred and spite today we still see that conflicts are still created over race, color, nationality, gender or religion.  Even such mundane things as how much money you make, what side of town you’re from, your height, your weight, what color is your hair or a number of other ridiculous items which are used to put a wedge between people for one reason or the other.  Why can’t we just admit that for whatever reasons we are ALL different and treat everyone accordingly?  We would certainly be able to get along better with each other if we would treat others the way we wanted them to treat us.

     Now let’s shift somewhat to a different area of consideration.  We have seen this type of situation over and over again.  An unbelievable situation developes somewhere in the country and immediately there are those “good Samaritans who come to the assistance of the involved individual(s).  One of the most touching of these in my opinion that happened recently (and I don’t remember the City although that’s irrelevant to the story) was the following:  The police got a call to a convenience store that a lady had been detained because of shoplifting.  When the officer got on the scene he made the determination that the lady had been caught for stealing diapers for her baby.  Now I’m not wanting to sound like I’m condoning her actions for theft, but it seems that the police officer saw the situation as I would have seen it.  Not only did he NOT arrest her for shoplifting, but he bought the diapers for her out of his own money.  I know, lately, because of SOME the police have been getting a bad “rap” and in some cases for good reasons.  However, there are those officers like the one I mentioned above who put our trust back in the “men in blue.”  So when you can, why not show your appreciation for these hard working men and women by perhaps paying for their meal when you see them in a restaurant.

     So if we can “cease fire” for a day or more: Or if we can have compassion in our hearts for those less fortunate than ourselves on certain occasions.  Why can’t it happen every day?  We need to remember that we are all in this cycle called life together.  Today we may be on the top of opportunities.  However, tomorrow we may be the one who needs the helping hand.  This may require a major shift in our thinking.  But, let’s not forget:  We’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"When things become the darkest - - - 

Let your light shine brighter."

There's Never Enough Time!

     It seems that regardless of how well we plan there are those occasions when we NEVER have enough time to get things done.  At least it seems that way!  Most of us have to set priorities in our daily routines.  We have to make decisions on which things we are going to do first, second, and so on.  But there are those times when we kinda get the priorities “out of order.” Then that really important thing we needed to get handled falls to the wayside and doesn’t get done.  Come on!  You have to admit that it has happened to you.  It’s probably happened more than once!  So we now we have a problem: WHAT are we going to about it?  I have compiled a few things to think about regarding this area.  Some of them have been suggested by many time management consultants over the years and they have proven to be basic steps in which to take.  Others I have related which have proven true within my life and business operations.  Maybe you can find SOMETHING within this information that will be useful to you.  (And you don’t have to pay me a $150 per hour consultation fee!)

   There is a NEED to set priorities.  Try this little test for yourself and see if it isn’t true.  Take a plastic bucket and place several large rocks inside it.  Then fill the bucket with sand.  You now have a bucket full of rocks and sand.  Empty the bucket but keep the same sand and rocks.  This time fill the bucket with the sand FIRST, and then try to place the rocks inside the bucket.  No room?  That is because you put the sand in the bucket first.  The rocks represent the more important things we need to get done and the sand represents those things we can “fill-in” around them.  You must take care of the more important FIRST!  To help you do this, try some of the following:

1.     Start within five minutes of sitting down at your desk and switching on your computer.  Half an hour or an hour wasted here or there on procrastination or distractions are costly.

2.    Value your time and other people will do the same.  Let them know that you have scheduled certain activities for specific times and (except in emergencies) do not deviate from this schedule.

3.    Get into the habit of switching off your email whenever you can, even if this is only for 15 minutes or 30 minutes at a time.  You would be surprised at how much time is wasted going back and forth to check your emails.  Consider: You don’t run to the post office or mail box every 10-15 minutes, do you?

4.    If you’re procrastinating, rather than getting frustrated or annoyed, simple ask yourself why you are procrastinating.  Are you scared of the task ahead?  Is it too difficult, too easy, or boring?  Are you tired?  We can waste a lot of energy and time on the things we’re putting off.  If you feel the task is too large, break it down into more manageable segments and tackle each one in its order.

5.    Sleep!  Set a specific time to go to bed each night.  Turn off the computer, the cell phone, the tablet and any other electronic devices and let your mind and body unwind.

6.    Do a time audit for one week and look at exactly where your time is going.  Notice where you spend your time on a regular week day.  Notice how you use your time on the weekends.  You may be surprised at finding places where you can make adjustments and save wasted time.

7.    Who drains your time?  What drains your time?  What drains your energy?  Limit the things that drain your time and energy.  Then, with the time you do have you’ll get more done in a focused, energized way.

8.    We all need “down” time.  Take mini breaks when you need them during the day to recharge and refocus.  Take lengthy breaks away from work on the weekends, in the evenings and on holidays to help you stay productive for the long term.

9.    We regularly underestimate how long something will take us.  Factor this in!  And don’t forget to allow for interruptions.  I used to plan my 8 hour work day with six and half hours of work.  I was usually very fortunate to get it all accomplished by the end of the day.

10. Check in with the cycles of nature now and again.  See how you are feeling in relation to sunrise and sunset, or to the changing of the seasons.  We often get caught up in our own perception of time, but there is a bigger natural cycle going on too.

     Remember we all only have 24 hours in a day.  It’s how we use that time that becomes the important thing.  Each of us must become aware of what works for us and use those techniques to our benefit.  In that way we will become the masters of our time and it will not become the master over us.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"If people know the right thing to do - - -

why are there so many attorneys?"