Judging

      From the moment of our birth we become part of the vicious circle of judging others.  “It’s he just the cutest thing you’ve ever seen?”  “Does she have the most adorable nose?”  It seems by our receiving such admiring comments from others around us we are imprinted with the idea that in some way, we are “better” than others because we have been favorably judged by those who are around us.    

     It doesn’t end when we are babies.  The praise and comparisons continue while we are growing up.  The areas in which we are compared to others changes, but the imprinted desire to be better than others is continually reinforced by those around us.  I must add, this is not always done with any type of malicious intent on the part of others.  It’s only that we have been ingrained with the idea that we are better and we must continue to prove that we are by what we do.  And if we can’t do things that demonstrate our superior then we are to do and say things that put others in a lower or inferior position to that of what we currently have.    

     We know and understand that there are going to be circumstances and situations where our actions HAVE to be judged, such as according to the legal system under which we live.  That IS NOT the type of judging that I am referring to.  I am talking about the type of judging wherever the conditions are presented where we have been indoctrinated to feel that for whatever reason we choose to use as the standard, we make ourselves feel, or appear, better than others.

     We do it because out school class is better than another.  It’s because our side of town is better.  My hometown is better than yours.  The country in which we are living is superior to another country.  Our parents are better.  Our type of employment is better.  Our financial standing is superior.  We are more beautiful than others.  We are better respected than our peers.  We could go on and on with any number of “areas” that we might use to compare ourselves with others and judge that “WE” are superior to them. 

     If you give the subject some serious thought, you’ll find that we truly are motivated from a very young age to begin compare ourselves with others and find “reasons,” whether they actually exist or not, to declare that WE are the ones who are superior.  And it is true, we do need a measure of pride and respect for ourselves so that we can have a certain dignity about our very existence.  But, the idea of any one of us being superior to another is a learned trait.  One that we are taught about ourselves from birth.  One that continues to get us into more trouble than we really want to admit.

     In actuality, the human body is approximately 99% comprised of just six elements: oxygen, hydrogen, nitrogen, carbon, calcium, and phosphorus.   So when you give the matter some thought, we are no more superior to another when considering we are composed of the same elements that make up other living things around us.  Our “superior” comes from the fact that we believe what others have been telling us from birth.  We are neither “superior” or “inferior” to one another, just different!  We major problem comes with dealing with the fact that we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"If it's not my right to judge YOU,

don't you judge ME!"

Time vs. Energy

      If you have been alive for many years, you’ve probably heard the old adage, “Life is a marathon, not a sprint.”  If you’re trying to manage your time effectively without paying attention to your energy management, you may end up with sprints rather than finishing the marathon of life.  The same is true for many other aspects of our live.

     Experts are now saying that productivity and success have more to do with how you manage your energy than it does with time management.  As a worker or owner in today’s business environment, we often try to do everything that gives us more time.  And I am not trying to say that there is anything wrong with that approach.  But don’t limit yourself to that alone.

     Eating healthy, staying fit, spending time with our children and connecting with others all take time and we do have to schedule some of our pursuits.  Although we do not always want to admit it, we all only have 24 hours in a day and a successful and happy life will depend, in part, on how we allocate those 24 hours.  However, when we are looking at the time constraints on our activities, we also need to consider another matter.  That is: whether we are overlooking the fact of will we  have the energy for those pursuits.

     Trying to adhere to certain times to manage everything can leave us all exhausted so that we’re not even able to relax and enjoy ourselves when we’ve “scheduled the time” for it.  I think for some time now the older generation has had this matter under better control that we gave them credit for.  When I was younger I would “snicker” at seeing older ones asleep in their chairs or on the park bench.  I thought they didn’t have anything important to do and just felt “more comfortable” taking a nap and letting the time pass them by.  However, could I have been wrong?

     Now that I have become a member of that older generation, I’ve found out that most often you have to conserve your energy during the day to make sure you are able to deal with the “more important” things that now fill your life and daily schedule.  As I stated, I think the older generation had this simple truth figured out a long time ago.  It was only us younger and less experienced ones who didn’t really understand the logic behind their actions.  We might have thought they had become weak and uncaring.  The truth is they understood what it means to conserve your energy for those things more important to you that you want to get accomplished.

     They knew the alternative to managing your time is to manage your energy effectively.  It works by taking time for recovering from those lengthy sprints you take so you can finish the marathon with ease rather than anguish.  It’s making sure of the really important things in your life and being able to enjoy them now that you have or have made the time for them.

     Here are some tips that can help you manage your energy more effectively:

·         List how you like to rejuvenate yourself. Make a list of what makes you feel refreshed, more creative and lifts your mood.  Writing these things down will help to remind you about the benefits of these uplifting activities.  For example, watching a great series or show you’re following on television, sipping a cup of tea and listening to music can be very rejuvenating to your energy levels.  And quite enjoyable too.

·       Double the time you usually take for breaks.  Don’t stick to a time table when it comes to reviving your energy level.  Take an hour rather than half an hour and have fun with whatever you’re doing.  It’s true our workloads and other commitments may make this a bit more difficult for some, but try your best.

·         Reward yourself for every goal reached.  Do you have lots of projects and it seems you’ll never finish them to be able to relax and enjoy yourself.  Break those projects down into parts and reward yourself after you complete each one – rather than waiting until the entire project is finished.  You may also need to realize that some of your “projects” are not really that important and should be removed from your “to-do” list.

·         Make frequent recovery stops.  While you’re on that mile-long sprint, you may feel the need to stop and renew your spirits and your energy.   Do it!  You’ll feel so much more like completing the marathon and you’ll be happier at the finish line.   And keep in mind that you don’t always have to be the first one to cross the finish line.   Calculate your own personal pace and stay with it!

     Managing your energy is a much more effective way to get through life rather than putting time limits and making schedules for everything.  Your inner energy thermostat doesn’t pay any attention to the time table you’ve created.  Instead, make your energy the most important factor in the long marathon you’re up against.   

     And never forget that as you travel down the road of life, YOU will forever be your own worst enemy.  You will be the one who creates the greatest problems for yourself.  That’s because we’re only human!      

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"The wisest thing is not that you have

 the extra energy to finish the race, 

but knowing at what point to use it!"

  

Change

 

   It’s that time of year again when most people are considering the change from summer to fall.  The days are becoming shorter and you can begin to feel the body trying to adjust to the sun coming up later and sinking over the horizon sooner that it had been doing. 

     Most people look forward to this time when the air becomes crisp and there begins to be just a bit of a nip on the nose letting you know that probably soon you will be needing to get out the coats and winter boots and you should be looking forward to having to scrape ice from your car windshield and remove snow from your driveway.  Yet, there are some who would rather it stay warmer for a little longer and are not just yet ready to make these changes.  But the changes will come none the less.

     And it will be soon that the evitable controversy over the changing of the time clocks will once again become the topic of conversation.  Move it back --- move it forward --- leave it where it is!  It happens every time during those changing seasons.  That debate will probably never be brought to an end.  If ANY type of solution is reached it will not be agreeable by everyone and so the argument will continue.

     However, change is not limited to just the seasons.  People change too!  And often it is those changes that affect others the greatest.  I’m not going to try within the limited confines of this blog post to mention all the people and all the changes that have taken place.  Not even in more recent times, but I will mention one that perhaps is very well known and has been a controversy to many peoples lives for a long time --- Dr. Spock!

     Now, before your eyebrows go up in disbelief (well, perhaps, ONE eyebrow)!  I am not talking about the green-blooded alien from Vulcan from Star Trek.  That was Mr. Spock.  I’m talking about Doctor Benjamin Spock (American pediatrician) whose book Baby and Child Care (1946), one of the best-selling volumes in history, and his other publications tried to help mothers realize that they knew more than they thought they did.

     In the 1960s and early 1970s his books were criticized for propagating permissiveness and an expectation of instant gratification which allegedly led young people to join the “New Left” and “Anti-Vietnam War” movements, although he personally denied this.  However, many of the opinions that he advocated within the pages of his books during the decades of his life, he later recanted for a change in his viewpoint.

     And you can probably think of others who have done such similar things within their lives.  However, we must realize that if we base our values on solid unchangeable principles there should be no need to waiver back and forth, as it were, between different opinions.  The problem we often have is where are we going to look to find that source of principles that we can base our trust upon.  The other problem is that we are always going to wonder if we have found that solid source or is there going to be a need to change?  The problem there is the fact that we’re only human! 

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Stop worrying about what you are

and concentrate on changing to what you can be!"

Looking Behind

      Now that I have had several decades pass within my life, it might seem a simple thing to look back at some of the decisions that I made.  Perhaps I could consider why I made them or even why I had rejected others.  However, before I would do that, I would need to have a good reason for doing so.  I think probably the most important reason for doing so could be summed up in the words of writer and philosopher George Santayana, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” (The Life of Reason, 1905)

     Sometimes as imperfect human creatures we think that we can continue to do the same thing over and over again and at some point, we will reap a different result.  Just think about this from a simple scientific perspective.  Most of us are aware that as a chemical compound, a water molecule contains one oxygen and two hydrogen atoms that are connected by covalent bonds.  We may also be aware that hydrogen is a versatile fuel that can be produced from many sources, including WATER!

     Now this is where it may become a bit more complicated.  There is a process (called electrolysis) that involves splitting water into hydrogen and oxygen with the help of electricity.  It would probably be better if you could watch a brief video on how this process works.  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=38ULHoKWZag )

     My point is that by using this method and knowing the chemical makeup of water, an individual or a company will always know the results that are going to be achieved.  Imagine using electrolysis on water thinking you are going to get carbon dioxide as one of your products.  You would probably be “laughed out” of your position.  Or, at the least, no longer be allowed to work on that specific project!

     From a unique perspective in time, we can look back on the results of the various decisions that we have had to make and no doubt see many areas where we could have made a better choice.  Thereby, obtaining more positive results.  But, we can’t, at the time of having to make such decisions, decide that we are going to achieve a new and unique result by following the same process over and over again!

     It is interesting how this may seem like a simple concept, but many have a very difficult time putting this idea into practice.  In a recent study it was stated: “But a new study suggests a “good rule of thumb in decision-making is, whenever you cannot decide what you should do, choose the action that represents a change, rather than continuing the status quo,” says University of Chicago economist Steven Levitt, who conducted the study.” (https://www.cnbc.com/2020/05/22/people-who-choose-change-more-satisfied-with-decision-study.html )

     Did you know that some of this type of thinking has been instilled within us from the time we were small children?  After you were born, you were pretty much helpless!  Everything had to be done for you by someone else.  When you were hungry, when you were wet, when you just didn’t feel good - - - you CRIED!  And someone came and took care of your dilemma.  For MOST of us, as we got older, and we cried because we wanted something done for us, we were total, “Get it yourself!” or maybe “Do it yourself!”  We learned that continuing to do the same thing (crying) would no longer get the results we were looking for.  So, we made changes!

     Unfortunately, some did not do that.  Even today, as adults, they continue to whine and sulk when they don’t get their way.  Again thinking that this action will bring the results they are wanting to achieve.  They never learned to “get it” themselves or “do it” for themselves!

     As you look back on your life, I don’t want you to think that I am saying that there was only ONE RIGHT decision that you should have made.  No, when we look at individual circumstances there are going to be many factors that must be considered before concluding which course to take at any specific time.  NO ONES circumstances, background, mental state, physical condition, and so on, are going to be exactly like someone else.  Given the information you have at any specific time is what you will use to make the best decision you can under those circumstances.  And people may make different decisions using the same criteria that you had available. 

     Our lives ARE NOT as simple as the chemical construction of water.  We are much more complicated.  Our circumstances are constantly changing around us as we attempt to make the best decisions we can.  And we are constantly changing as individuals, growing and expanding as we learn and experience different things in our lives.  But, one constant deterrent that we all have is the every-looming fact: we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"You can't walk straight ahead

when you are looking behind!"

A Rose

 

   “”A rose by any other name would smell as sweet” is a popular reference to William Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet, in which Juliet seems to argue that it does not matter that Romeo is from her family’s rival house of Montague, that is, that he is named “Montague”.  The reference is often used to imply that the names of things do not affect what they really are.” (Wikipedia.org)

     I was reminded of this recently within a family situation that came up with my siblings.  I found out several months ago that my younger brother was in the process (and has since completed) having his name legally changed.  He has, for some time now, been producing artwork and offering it for sale on the internet.  When I inquired of him about the change, his reply was that the name he had selected (although using his original initials) gave the impression of a more artistic “ring.”  It really made no difference to me and I could understand the reasoning he had laid out for doing it.

     However, a couple of weeks ago, I got a phone call from my older sister.  Her first words were “Have you talked to our brother lately?”  I had, but I wasn’t sure where she was going with posing the question the way she did.  She then told me that she had heard he had changed his name!  She was NOT pleased!  Her tone changed quickly and she began to barrage me with questions (although I knew she was not waiting for me to give her some kind of response).  “What does he think he is doing?  Is he not wanting to be our brother anymore?”  and so on. 

     This made me think about some individuals of the past that we have come to accept by their self-imposed pseudonyms.  One of my favorite American writers, humorist, entrepreneurs, publishers, and lecturers is Samuel L. Clemens, or as you probably know him better, Mark Twain.  His beloved novels include The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and its sequel, the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.  He was a well-respected individual of his time having paid back all his debts even after being relieved of doing so by bankruptcy.  But you may not have known that Clemens tried his writing career under another pen name before becoming the now famous, Mark Twain.  Between October 18, 1856 and March 14, 1857 Clemens contributed at least three travel letters to the Keokuk (Iowa) Post for which he received a minimum payment of $5.00 each.  He signed his contributions “Thomas Jefferson Snodgrass.”  The letters are significant in that they represent one of Clemens’ earliest attempts at writing in a vernacular voice according to twainquotes.com.

     One you may or may not be as familiar with is George Eliot.  This famous 19-century writer became one of the most important English novelists of the era next to Charles Dickens.  In fact, Dickens himself once wrote, in an 1858 letter to the novelist, “The exquisite truth and delicacy, both of the humor and the pathos of those stories [in Scenes of Clerical Life] I have never seen the like of.”  Also the novel Middlemarch is widely regarded as one of the greatest novels ever written in English.  This famous writer not only changed their name for “artistic” reasons, but also changed their gender!  George Eliot was in fact, a female, Mary Ann Evans.  The use of a pen name by female authors has been one way they have tried to level the playing field and get their voices heard.  This has not changed even today.  Her publicist encouraged Joanne Rowling to write her “Harry Potter” series under the name of J.K. Rowling to improve her readership of those who might be somewhat leery of reading the works of a woman.  By the way, she also writes crime fiction under the pen name Robert Galbraith!

     And there could be many other examples that I could quote.  It wouldn’t be limited to the writing field either.  We are all familiar with those actors in Hollywood who have changed their names and gone on to be box-office successes.

     The point I am making is exactly what William Shakespeare was making in his line from “Romeo and Juliet” that I quoted at the opening of this post.  “A rose by any other name would smell as sweat.”  Just because the name of something has been changed doesn’t mean that its essence has changed in some way.  If you were to take an apple that you loved and began calling it “sweet fruit,” would it now taste different to you somehow?  Would you no longer consider enjoying the fruit since the name had changed?  These are things that we have to consider when evaluating our feelings about other things that have now become different.  The biggest obstacle in facing these types of situations is the fact that we’re only human! 

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"The caterpillar becomes the butterfly.

Change can be the start of a new beginning."

Think!

      The human brain is an unbelievably marvelous organ.  It consists of about one billion neurons, each being able to form about 1,000 connections to the other neurons, amounting to more than a trillion connections. (Scientific American)  Neurons combine so that each one helps with the storage of many memories at a time, exponentially increasing the brain’s memory storage capacity to something around 2.5 petabytes (or a million gigabytes).  However, most of the scientific community will admit that the true capacity of the human brain is not fully known.  It would seem that the brain’s capacity is, for all practical purposes, limitless!

     It has been proposed that everything we have experienced in our lives from the moment of birth, the sights, the sounds, the feelings, all responses recorded by our senses, is still stored within the confines of our human brains.  If that is the case, someone may ask: “Why can’t I remember things?”  I feel that the problem is not that we don’t have the information stored within our brains, but we have a problem with recall!  Our retrieval system has been flawed by our human imperfections.

     The saddest part of this topic, in my opinion, is that with this marvelous ability within ourselves to have at our disposal this vast amount of knowledge, we fail to put into use the most fundamental portion of the process and that is to THINK about a situation before we take any actions.  You know what I am talking about.  How many times have you done something or said something and almost immediately knew within yourself that you shouldn’t have done or said that?  It happens to all of us from time to time.  This is because you have not properly trained ourselves to THINK!

     If we look at our present society you can understand what I am talking about.  If you are an older person you will remember in school you had to learn reading, writing, and arithmetic (and probably many other subjects).  Today, kids don’t have to know how to read, they wait for the video or an audio presentation and just watch or listen to what is being said.  And if you have ever seen some of the text messages from kids today, they DON’T need to know how to write.  If you can’t say something by using initials, codes, or emojis, it’s probably not going to be said by a young person! 

     And while we are talking about younger ones, I shouldn’t really get started on the topic of math (arithmetic)!  Many young people today can’t add 2 + 2 without the use of a calculator.  They DON’T know how to make change for a dollar when a purchase is made.  And I’m really surprised that they are able to understand if they are getting paid the proper wages for their job, if they have a job!

     In the overall scheme of things, young people today are not trained on how to THINK!  Everyone says they want to be their own person, make their own decisions, and not have anyone telling them what to do!  However, when we look a bit closer, we see that many people are only waiting for others to tell them what they are to do, where they are supposed to go, how they are supposed to act, and what they are supposed to think, because they don’t want to do it for themselves because they have never learned HOW to do it!

     They simply want to follow the crowd and be lead along with what they have been told is the proper and acceptable thing to do.  When I was growing up my mother used to tell us kids: “If EVERYONE was jumping off the bridge into the river, would you do it too?”  When I was younger, I often thought my parents were not very intelligent people (probably the same as many younger ones today), but as I got older, I realized that they were more intelligent than I gave them credit for.  In looking at my mother’s comment today, I understand she was NOT telling me NOT to jump off a bridge.  There may be times and circumstances when jumping off a bridge could save your life.  She was telling me to THINK before I took action and not simply go along with the crowd.  She wanted me to use the brain ability that I had been given and make good and proper decisions for myself and perhaps others around me.

     When I look at the world scene today, I find that many of the younger ones who have now grown to take prominent positions on the world stage but have still not learned how to use the thinking ability of their brains to make good decisions and they are still making poor ones.  The problem is that the decisions they are making today effect a large amount of people around them and, most often, not for the better.

     We should try more to THINK before we speak or act and hopefully, we’ll do things better.  However, we always have that one stumbling block that we all must face: we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"In our own way

we can all be different!"

Handling Stress

      If you look back on human history, in any time period and during any circumstance, people have always had to deal with stress.  You can’t get away from it because stress is our body’s response to pressure.  If you live in the “big” city or in a small rural environment you will always have pressures to deal with during your life.  This is true regardless if you are young or old. 

     Stress has always been a part of our lives.  In this present hectic time in which we are living, people lead an increasingly stressful life.  Experts state that a little stress can be good; it keeps you sharp and ready to move forward, and is sometimes vital for achieving optimum performance.  However, medical research has determined that prolonged stress is very bad for the body, and can block the body’s natural ability to repair, regenerate and protect itself.  Over 90% of disease is caused by stress.  Stress is both a physical and psychological response.  It can lead to chronic disease, obesity, insomnia, deteriorating relationships, depression, and more.

     Stress is such a powerful and harmful force that it is vital that you learn effective stress management techniques in order to live a successful, happy, and healthy life.  We must remember that we will always come across inevitable factors that cause pressure and anxiety on us.  What we do not know is that it is not really the problems that are difficult to deal with, but our attitude towards them.  So basically, the cause of stress is your attitude toward these things.  What, then, is an effective way to deal with stressors?

Below I have listed 5 great tips to help you handle stress better.

1. Identify what makes you stressful and uneasy.  Making a list of your stressful experiences is useful.  This will be a good starting point for you.  Immediately deal with the issues that you can change, for instance waking up earlier for work in the morning, not leaving things till the last minute, and delegating tasks in case you are taking responsibility for everything.  Then you can forget about the issues that you cannot influence like being stuck in a traffic jam or not getting into the elevator because there is no room for you.  Those, and others, that you really have NO personal control over.

2. Calm down.  A few minutes break would do you good.  Wash your face, breath slowly and deeply, and notice if there is tension in any part of your body and release it.  You can also listen to relaxing music, or call a friend.  Releasing your inner feelings to a friend is healthy option.  I’m not saying throw YOUR burdens on your friend.  I’m simply saying that by sharing how you feel will greatly help you in relieving the pressure upon yourself.

3. It will pass and it will be over before you know it.  Remind yourself that the stressful event will end sooner or later and this can make you see the positive sides of things.  At the same time, calm down your emotions and think of what is the best thing to do rather than take your energy away from what needs to be done.  I remember as a young boy I had a cousin visit our family one summer.  She had this great gyroscope toy that I was simply fascinated with.  However, she refused to let me play with it.  One afternoon when she had gone shopping with my sisters, I found the toy and started to play.  The center piece flew out of the toy and I need I was going “to get killed!”  I had taken the toy, that I wasn’t supposed to have, played with it, and BROKE it!  I hid the toy and walked around the town for hours stressing over what was going to happen.  Finally, I couldn’t take the pressure any longer.  I went home, gave the toy to my cousin, and confessed my sin.  My cousin looked at the toy and said: “It always does that!” and popped the center piece back into place.  I had been stressing all afternoon FOR NOTHING!

4. Know yourself.  Ask yourself: What triggers your anxiety?  If for example it is your job, then maybe it’s time for you to reconsider whether it would be best to find a less stressful job if you can.  You can also make your job more tolerable by allowing yourself to get that needed vacation or leave that you have earned.  Learning to deal with pressure better will also help you understand yourself and be able to deal with your personal stresses.

5. Learn to use your relaxation response.  Just as we all have within us the stress response, we also have an opposite response, which is the relaxation response.  A person should elicit that on a regular basis.  The relaxation response involves two steps.  First, repetition.  The repetition can be a word, a sound, an expression, or a repetitive movement.  The second step is to ignore other thoughts that come to your mind while you’re doing the repetition, and come back to the repetition.  The technique should be used once or twice a day for about 15 minutes or perhaps more initially, if needed.  Sit quietly and choose a suitable repetition, like a prayer, the sound Om, or the word love, or calm.  I’ve often enjoyed the sound of waves crashing on the beach, very relaxing.  Or you can do a repetitive exercise, for instance yoga, jogging, Reiki.  Additional repetitive activities are knitting or handicraft.  When you incorporate this into your everyday life, you become calmer and better able to handle the stressors.  Practice makes perfect and the more you practice relaxing your mind, the easier it gets.

     The true causes of stress are not the problems or negative experiences that you encounter in your life; but your attitude toward them.  So, the trick is to change your attitude and to develop a relaxed state, because you cannot be stressed and relaxed at the same time.  It is important to understand that what we focus on, we energize.  The more you continue to think about the factors that cause your stress, the more energy you give it.  So it is vital to let go and focus on relaxation instead.  Consequently, you’re less likely to be upset by a stressor, and thus less likely to have its harmful effect occur.  Eventually, it is your choice.  You could either continue to react in the same stressful way, or you could choose to improve your life by changing your attitude and becoming relaxed.  There’s no other way around it.

     Just remember that your greatest enemy of self-contentment and joy will be YOU!  And that is because we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Why worry about what

you can't control?"

Self-Confidence

 

     When I was growing up there was a children’s book called “The Little Engine That Could.”  I think it is still being published.  The story is used to teach children the value of optimism and hard work.  The “catch phrase” of the story was that the little engine kept telling himself:  “I think I can.”  This was his determination to make it to the top of the mountain, no matter how steep or difficult the strain on himself became.  He was not going to let anything prevent him from reaching his goal.  In my opinion, many of the young adult generation of today NEVER read that book as a child!

     However, if you believe in yourself, there is little to stop you in whatever you want to accomplish.  It gives you the power to push forward and to defy the odds.  You will be able to handle any roadblocks that come your way. You will also brush off the naysayers.  It gives you peace of mind when you stick to your self-belief.  I’m not saying that mere belief in yourself alone is what will get things accomplished.  But, like the little engine, when you believe you can get things accomplished, you will MAKE the way to get it done.

     To keep your self-belief strong, you need to define your goals.  You wouldn’t expect a General to fight a war without a map or a strategy.  You too need a map to guide you on how to proceed.  You must understand, like the little engine, you need to know WHERE you are going, or you will never know when you actually get there!  Too many people skip this step and wonder why they aren’t getting anywhere.

     Goals are your guidance, like the tract the little engine had to direct his path up the side of the steep mountain.  But carrying through with them is only done when you believe that it’s possible, when you keep reaping in your mind, “I think I can!”  The belief is the energy you need to take action.  It helps you to focus on getting your tasks completed.  It helps add purpose to your actions because you know where you are headed and you have determined how you are going to get there!

     You will also build confidence when you have self-belief.  It’s a powerful tool as others will be attracted to that confidence.  They will follow your lead, and you will help show them what is possible.  When you run into any stumbling blocks (and you will), that confidence will help you see them through.  You will know how to take any alternative action when it becomes necessary.  The people following you will respect you for that as well.  Your self-confidence will make others have confidence that you (and your task) WILL get completed.

     Whenever you are trying to personally accomplish something or endeavor to reach your goals, several forces will try to beat you down.  You may even find yourself letting it happen and giving up on yourself.  You need to get centered on why you started your journey in the first place.  Use affirmations to reinforce your message.  Remember the little engine: “I think I can.  I think I can.”  Be consistent with your affirmations.  In time your affirmations will become “I KNOW I can!”

     Unfortunately, many of the negative forces that you are going to face are going to be from your family and friends. They will see it as helping you avoid mistakes and trying to “save” you from the mental anguish of “failure”.  Many people will succumb to this negative pressure and give up.  One way to prevent this is to join groups of like-minded individuals.  It can be related to your business, or it can be groups that focus on self-help.  These organizations exist to try and push the negative forces out.  It’s great to go to meetings and get encouragement from the group.  However, be sure to do your research on the group and join the one that is going to be most beneficial to YOU!

     Such group meetings can be very helpful to you.  Attending these group meetings can sometimes lead to friendships with people where you can extend the encouragement of each other.  You may even form business partnerships from these friendships.  It’s good to know that you have the support of these people when these relationships form.  They understand when everyone else around you just “doesn’t get you” and the goals you are trying to achieve!  Your self-belief will strengthen considerably from this arrangement.

     Other than your family and friends, however, you will have another enemy to contend with:  YOU!  With everything that you try and contemplate, your greatest hurdle to overcome in developing self-confidence is the fact that we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"If everyone can do it,

is it worth doing?"