Happiness

         Merriam-Webster defines the word “happiness” as a state of well-being and contentment :  b : a pleasurable or satisfying experience .  There are many synonyms of the word: contentment · pleasure · contentedness · satisfaction · cheerfulness · cheeriness · merriment · merriness · gaiety · joy · joyfulness · joyousness · joviality · jollity · jolliness · glee · blitheness · carefreeness · gladness · delight · good spirits · high spirits · light-heartedness · good cheer · well-being · enjoyment · felicity · exuberance · exhilaration · elation · ecstasy · delirium · jubilation · rapture · bliss · blissfulness · euphoria · beatitude · transports of delight · heaven · paradise · seventh heaven · cloud nine · delectation · jouissance.  And there may be others.

     What do you think of when you hear the word “happiness?”  Some people think of the THINGS that they feel will give them happiness.  “If I only had this or that job, then I’d be happy.”  “If I lived in this city or country or area, I’d be happy.”  “If only that person would return my affections, I’d be the happiest person in the world!”

     You’ve heard such comments and probably many others.  But do these things REALLY make us happy?  Many people have found that they don’t!  Many people have learned that true happiness comes from serving others.  They volunteer to assignments for NO pay, just the satisfaction of having helped someone. 

    You might give it a try yourself.  It doesn’t have to some HUGE endeavor but just something where you give others joy and happiness.  By opening up your heart to the needs of others you will it very rewarding to yourself.  Try to reach out for some of these available programs in your neighborhood.  You may find out that you will be happier by doing so.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Being happy all depends on you."

Choose

     I’ve given some thought to making my topic material shorter so you can read it and absorb the message must faster.  In that vein I’m making the blog posts here and in the future around 300 to 400 words.  Enjoy!

     There are times when you want to do so many things but the time, money or circumstances just do not permit it.  We have all had those types of things occur within our lives.  We all have to make decisions every day that require some sacrifices within our lives.   

     You can have THIS, but not THAT!  You know the types of situations that I’m talking about.  It may occur when you want to lose weight.  Do I eat this or that?  Can I include this piece of dessert on my diet or not?  Other situations also make us choose between this and that.  It becomes very difficult when these situations involve people, especially our relatives.

     Have you ever been torn between the ideas of: Should I help my relative do this? Or should I let them fend for themselves?  At what point do I stop being a help to them or only becoming a crutch for them to lean on and continue their lifestyle?

     Sometimes this can be a very delicate situation.  If I help this person what do I do when another person comes to me and wants me to help them?  If I give in to certain demands can I ever make a strong stand in another situation?

     Many questions will probably come to your mind.  You may also have to consider if you help one of your relatives in their situation how does this affect your relationship with other family members?  This can become very “sticky” when the situation involves, for example, a grandparent and their grandchild.  If the grandparent helps the child, how are the child’s parents going to react, that is the grandparents’ child?

          It can unfortunately end in hurt feelings all around.  The relationships may become so torn apart that reconciliation appears to be impossible.  The hurt and the pain may continue for years into the future.  But we have to remember that ALL of us are only human.  We’re bound to make mistakes and bad decisions throughout our lives.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Whenever we have choices to make,

make them wisely."

Memory

     There are times when our memories are not as good as they should be.  We forget appointments, to take our medicine, even the names of our children.  I’m not talking about a serious mental problem or dementia or something like that.  I’m just acknowledging the fact as we get older our memory sometimes is a little faulty.

     Have you reached that point in your life where you get out of your chair and walk into another room to get something or do something, then once in the other room you forgot why you went in there?  Only to find yourself returning to your chair and as soon as your rear hits the cushion you remember why you got up!

     You can’t go shopping any more unless you prepare yourself a list, because you will leave the store and NOT have all the items you intended to purchase.  And usually the one item you forgot is the one that was your main reason for going to the store in the first place.

     Now you don’t want to admit it, but if you are getting to that certain age, and you know what age I’m talking about, you know it has happened to you.  There are those moments when, in the middle of a sentence, you will forget your thought completely.  It may take you several minutes to remember what you were talking about, if you remember at all.

     And there are many other such situations that you will probably recall where the memory just fades at the most inopportune times.  Names in particularly will not come to you when you want them to.  You’re shopping, etc. and you run into an old school mate, or work mate and their name just does not come up into your memory.  You remember having these situations!

     Now that you have admitted that these things are happening to you, how can we explain just the opposite problem that many of us deal with?  We don’t want to think that we could have this problem but we do.  We meet someone we haven’t seen for a long time.  It might even be a family member!  And the first thing that jumps into our mind is the BAD thing they did to us MANY years ago. 

     We can’t forget it.  It is as if it just happened a few days earlier.  Or maybe it’s something we feel they SHOULD have done and didn’t!  We’re not ever going to forget it.  And we’re not going to let them forget about it either!

     It may be our selective memory, but we remember anyway.  We can recall practically EVERY detail of the situation:  Where we were.  What we were doing.  Why it has bothered us so long.  It feels like we have this terrible wound that we keep opening up and pouring salt into and we can’t (or won’t) let it heal.

     That’s the problem with our memory.  It doesn’t work very well when we want it to, but it works too well concerning things that should be forgotten.  It just helps us remember that we’re only human!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Some things should never be forgotten ---

I just don't remember what they are!"

Prioritize

     Sometimes we feel that there are not enough hours in the day to get everything done that is on our “to-do” list.  There may be occasions when we are adding more things to the list and we are taking off.  Or we’re adding them faster than we’re able to get them done!

     Maybe one of our problems is that we need to get our list of things to do must be put into the proper order:  prioritize!  What does this really mean for us to make some sense of our duties?

     From the Oxford Dictionary:  Prioritize means “determine the order for dealing with (a series of items or tasks) according to their relative importance.”  That’s a lot of words but in common sense thinking it means that we must determine which items need to done first!  Which have a greater importance within our lives in relationship to the other things that we have to do?

     To give a very simple example:  Today we have to eat our meals and we have to go to town to buy a newspaper.  I think we can see which of these two items would be more important for us to get accomplished.  Obviously eating would take priority over getting a news paper.

     It is also obvious that our lives are much more involved and complicated than the two simple tasks that I listed in the paragraph above.  So how do we get our “to-do” list in the proper order?

     According to a post in The Liquidplanner Blog by Tatyana Sussex (April 8, 2014) (https://www.liquidplanner.com/blog/how-to-prioritize-work-when-everythings-1/), although these apply primarily to the business section you can use these steps principals in your everyday life.  Here are six steps that you should take:

1. Collect a list of all your tasks.

     Pull together everything you could possibly consider getting done in a day. Don’t worry about the order, or the number of items up front.

2. Identify urgent vs. important.

     The next step is to see if you have any tasks that need immediate attention. We’re talking about work that, if not completed by the end of the day or in the next several hours, will have serious negative consequences (missed client deadline; missed publication or release deadlines, etc.). Check to see if there are any high-price dependencies that rely on you finishing up a piece of work now.

3. Assess value.

     Next, look at your important work and identify what carries the highest value to your business and organization. As a general practice, you want to recognize exactly which types of tasks have top priority over the others.

     For example, focus on: client projects before internal work; setting up the new CEO’s computer before re-configuring the database; answering support tickets before writing training materials, and so on. Another way to assess value is to look at how many people are impacted by your work. In general, the more people involved or impacted, the higher the stakes.

4. Order tasks by estimated effort.

     If you have tasks that seem to tie for priority standing, check their estimates, and start on whichever one you think will take the most effort to complete. Productivity experts suggest the tactic of starting the lengthier task first. But, if you feel like you can’t focus on your meatier projects before you finish up the shorter task, then go with your gut and do that. It can be motivating to check a small task off the list before diving into deeper waters.

5. Be flexible and adaptable.

     Uncertainty and change is a given. Know that your priorities will change, and often when you least expect them to. But—and here’s the trick—you also want to stay focused on the tasks you’re committed to completing.

     6. Know when to cut.

     You probably can’t get to everything on your list. After you prioritize your tasks and look at your estimates, cut the remaining tasks from your list, and focus on the priorities that you know you must and can complete for the day. Then take a deep breathe, dive in and be ready for anything.

     If you can get into the habit of following these simple steps you will find that your everyday tasks will become easier for you to manage.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"You'll always have your priorities right

when you learn what is truly important!"

Enjoy

     I have thought about this for some time and wondered if anyone else has done the same.  Years ago a friend of mine gave me some advice that I wish I had taken sooner.  He said:  “Find something you enjoy doing, which you would do even if you couldn’t get paid to do it, and then find a way for people to pay you.”  I have often known that if you enjoy your work you’ll always be happier in what you are doing.

     Many people “settle” for some type of employment and Y-E-A-R-S later discover that they really don’t enjoy doing it.  They show up every day and put in the hours, but they are only waiting until the “five o’clock whistle” so they can leave and go home.  Hopefully to something that they enjoy.

     Think of those people who are sports stars.  Some of us may think they show up for a three or four hour game and make ALL that money.  Really any sport, if you are going to be good at it, requires a tremendous dedication.  You have to put in long hours of training, on and off the field, or court, or wherever you play!  This is so during your playing season and your off-season.  You must have a daily routine to make sure that you are ready to perform your profession.  That is the same with any employment we do.

     If we truly love what we do and enjoy doing it, we will devote the needed time and energy to be a professional at it.  Some years ago my wife and I took a trip to Honolulu.  The vacation there was tremendously enjoyable.  While there we did some shopping at many of the local stores.  One of the places I visited was Wyland’s studio.  Robert Wyland, if you are not familiar with him, is known as the “artist of the sea”.  He has several studios within the United States.  From his website (www.wyland.com) we are told about him: “Renowned marine life artist Wyland changed the way people think about our environment when he started painting life-size whales on the sides of buildings in the 1980s. Wyland always thought big. And he never stopped. Today, the Wyland name has become synonymous with the new generation of awareness about environmental conservation. Through his unique marine life paintings, sculptures, and photography, Wyland has inspired a generation about the importance of marine life conservation.”  Here is a man who truly enjoys the work that he does and he is rewarded financially for his efforts.

     Any of us can do the same thing.  Maybe we can’t paint, or sculpt, or do anything artistic like that, but we can become very compassionate about our work and can be rewarded for it.  Whatever our line of work is we can find enjoyment if we are performing it to the best of our abilities.  We can also recognize that the work we perform can be very rewarding to others.  Many may not look upon the local trash collector as a “preferred” line of work for them, but where would we be if there was no one to pick up all the trash we create week after week?

     We’re all only human and may have different thoughts within this area, but remember we can make the personal decision to do what we enjoy and enjoy what we do!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Learn to enjoy life,

you will be much happier that way."

Inspiration

     I’m sitting in front of my computer and thinking: I need a good topic to write about for my next blog post.  I need some inspiration for a good topic!  Wait!  Why don’t I make inspiration my next good topic?  That sounded like a good idea to me.  

     You’ve probably heard that “necessity is the mother of invention”.  That is, when the need for something becomes imperative, you are forced to find ways of getting or achieving it. There’s not a 100% fact of the origin of that statement although it has been attributed to Plato.  Nevertheless, the statement is sound and basically easy to understand.   When you REALLY need to have something, create a process, or otherwise come up with some new way (or perhaps easier way) of getting something done --- you do it!

     Now that’s not to say this process is the ONLY way new things or processes get created.  Take for example penicillin.  Penicillin was first discovered in 1928, by Scottish scientist Sir Alexander Fleming. It was a mistake.  He left a petri dish with staphylococcus open and later found it with a green - blue mould in it.  The discovery was made after leaving his desk untidy while on holiday.  It was only later he discovered it had bacteria fighting agents and could be sued as an anti body.  So one of your best used medical discoveries was only an accident!

     Here’s one you might not have hear about.  You know about Post-it notes.  You’ve probably used them at your office or somewhere in your home.  We can’t really get through a day without them at times.  You might be surprised about how they were invented.  Consider this little tidbit from http://www.ideafinder.com/history/inventions/postit.htm.  “No one got the idea and then stayed up nights to invent it.  A man named Spencer Silver was working in the 3M research laboratories in 1970 trying to find a strong adhesive.  Silver developed a new adhesive, but it was even weaker than what 3M already manufactured.  It stuck to objects, but could easily be lifted off.  It was super weak instead of super strong.  No one knew what to do with the stuff, but Silver didn’t discard it.  Then one Sunday four years later, another 3M scientist named Arthur Fry was singing in the churches choir.  He used markers to keep his place in the hymnal, but they kept falling out of the book.  Remembering Silver’s adhesive, Fry used some to coat his markers.  Success!  With the weak adhesive, the markers stayed in place, yet lifted off without damaging the pages.  3M began distributing Post-it Notes nationwide in 1980 – ten years after Silver developed the super weak adhesive.  Today they are one of the most popular office products available.”

     I’m not sure if you’re ready for this one.  Do any of you remember eating the “ice cream of the future” –Dippin’ Dots?  You may not want to know that it was originally invented because a man who yogurt bacteria for cattle wanted to freeze his ice cream faster.  In 1987, Curt Jones was just a microbiologist researching how to quick-freeze yogurt bacteria to use in animal feed.  Within a year, he had created his confection by flash freezing ice cream mix in liquid nitrogen.  At negative 320 degrees, the liquid gas is cold enough to instantly freeze anything that is added to it.  He says: “I grew up on a farm and used to make homemade ice cream a lot.  Working on the yogurt bacteria, I found the little beads fun to play with.  Then a month or two later, I was making ice cream with a neighbor and decided it would be better if we could freeze it faster, like we were doing with the yogurt.”  And the rest is history as they say.

     So maybe it’s time for you to have an accident, invent a mistake, or try to save yourself some time in making your favorite snack.  From your inspiration the rest of us may gain a bit more enjoy out of life!

     Today it seems that REAL ESTATE investing is THE area to consider to make large sums of money.  There are many ways in which an individual can become involved in this game!  I have found to begin with (and get your feet wet) working as a birddog can be very rewarding.  Check out this program to see how it can be done very easily:  BirdDogBot.  

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"If I inspire to be great,

then great is what I'll be."

Exercise

     Today I finished my exercise program about half an hour ago and it got me thinking.  Almost everything in our lives is like exercise!  Now hear me out as I try to explain this to you because I know there are many who don’t like to exercise, but like me probably should.

     When you first start your exercise program you think: I’m going to do some walking or running.  Then I’m going to go lift some weights for a few minutes and it will all be over.  The surprise comes when you learn that you must walk or run in a certain way.  Even riding your bike there must be a method on how it should be done.  Weight lifting is the same way.  If you don’t learn the proper technique you’ll probably end up hurting yourself very badly.  You also find out that you must start off with a balanced routine and work yourself up to being faster, going longer and lifting heavier in your program of walking, running, biking, or working out with weights.

     If you look at your daily work routine it is basically the same.  You must not only learn what the steps are you are going to perform, but you must learn in what order they need to be done.  Once you have mastered the “basics” you will advance to doing the routine more quickly and more efficiently than you had been doing it before.  Another surprise, just as it is in exercising, you’ll find that you begin to enjoy the routine more and it becomes easier to do.

     Look at another area.  For you young ones or even for us adults who decide to begin college classes (or other educational programs), at first the work may seem to be very b-o-r-i-n-g!  But after you spend the time to understand the concepts of what you are learning and figure out how they work together to make the ultimate concluding process a success all the time and effort now seems worth the efforts.  You’ll also learn that this NEW process will probably make your life much easier.

     Some years back I had that very experience when the company I was working for sent me back to Maryland to a computer class.  They had purchased a completely new computer system to be installed within our business operations and someone had to be trained on all its functions.  That someone turned out to be me!  The class was held from Monday morning to Friday at noon.  On the first day the instructor told us that there was going to be many things that we would be covering and we would have many handouts to consider each evening after the training.  But not to be concerned because by Thursday noon it would all make sense as we developed the complete picture of the computers operations.  And he was right!  By the time we “graduated” on Friday at noon the twelve of us in the class were all “experts” on using that computer system.

     Like exercise learning something new may be a real pain in the lower posterior, but after we have invested the time and energy needed we can be successful in the outcome we are attempting to realize.  Like exercise we may have to demonstrate a great amount of self-discipline to make sure we “stay with it” until the ultimate goal is achieved, but when we have developed that pattern of operation within our life we will not only enjoy the work (exercise) better we will enjoy ourselves too!

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"Exercise your mind and body 

so the whole person is in good health."

Life

     Today I was listening to the news while I was having my breakfast.  Those young boys still trapped in that cave in Thailand.  Now one of the rescue crew had died trying to save them.  Almost the entire western United States is being burned to the ground with some 66 different fires raging at the same time.  The heat is supposed to be extremely high again today making firefighting efforts very difficult.  And the eastern United States is being flooded!

     With these perplexing events and others it can be, at times, difficult for a person to look at their own life and enjoy the marvelous daily aspects of living.  Sometimes we forget to pause and “smell the roses” as the expression goes.  But we need to stop from time to time and ponder our own existence so that we can appreciate what we truly have.

     There are times when we feel “so down” on ourselves because we don’t have this or we don’t have that.  But do we truly appreciate the things we DO have?  At times life can put such great pressures on us that it is hard to think that there is anything good in our life.  We are always trying to think of the next thing we can get or the next place we can visit.  And, not that these things are wrong in themselves, but they seem to prevent us from enjoying the moment that we are currently living in and not appreciating what we have!  We learn this pattern at a very young age.

     Take as an example:  When we were young children we may be out with our parents enjoying a lunch at McDonalds (or whatever fast food place you enjoy visiting).  We’re eating our favorite food at this place and at the same time we are asking our parents: “What are we going to have for supper?”  You know you’ve done it!  We’re all guilty of it.  We want to prepare ourselves for what may be coming in the future but we are not really enjoying the moment we are having.  And it doesn’t always have to concern food.  We do the same thing about what are we going to wear, where are we going to visit and so on.

     However if you have ever had an event in your life where you thought it was coming to an end all of a sudden the “small” things seem to be much more valuable to you.  Perhaps it’s only a smile from your mate or your children, that simple little hug for no reason, or maybe just a moment of silence sitting together and enjoying a spectacular view of the scenery.  Whatever the case may be for you those more tender moments have a lot more value in your eyes.

     What we should probably do is attempt to fill our lives with more of those moments and prepare ourselves for what may happen when we no longer have the opportunity to create those moments anew.  I remember the little saying that goes:  “I never appreciated my shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”  Let us always cherish the life we have and never take any moment of it for granted.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"If this life is all there is,

make it the best life you can have."

Vacation

     Many this time of year are heading out to various locations for a family vacation.  Some may go to the mountains, some to the beach, others to perhaps different family locations.  Regardless, all will want to enjoy the company, the fun, and the brief opportunity to relax away from their normal daily distractions.

     For some they would have planned for months for this trip.  It may have been a special trip that you have planned for since your vacation last year.  This year it may be that “once in a lifetime” excursion to a tropical island, or a cruise, or some other location that you know you will probably never return to again within your lifetime!

     I realize that there may be safety aspects you will want to take into consideration.  You’ll have to plan your time and develop a realistic budget for this trip.  I’m not even going to talk about what you might do on this amazing outing.  What I’m going to consider in this blog is probably something you have never given consideration to when you line up your vacation plans: routine!

     You really need to consider how you can do all the things you want to do, enjoy all the excitement and the “long” hours of activities and yet keep yourself within your daily routine as you would be doing if you were still home.  Now I’m not talking about considering your work routine while you are vacationing.  No, I mean your personal daily routine: when you get up, when you go to bed, and so on.

     You will find by doing this you will have less “jet lag”, feel less fatigued, and return from your vacation more relaxed than you imagined you could.  I know it doesn’t sound possible and I am not saying that you wouldn’t be able to enjoy that occasional “late night” event.  But, imagine how more in control it would make you feel!

     Right away some of you are saying under your breathe:  “But, I’m on vacation!”  Doesn’t that mean that you are not supposed to do the things you do every day?  You are supposed to have fun, enjoy yourself, and do something different!  And you can do that!  Just do it in a controlled manner so that your routine doesn’t suffer.

     Plan your daily activities so that if on one particular night you are going to be up a bit later than usual you can perhaps have a nap in the afternoon to prepare yourself.  The next day you may start your activities a bit later than normal so you can adjust for the night before and so on.  Following some simple adjustments to your schedule you will find that the activities you do participate in will be more enjoyable than you had thought possible.

     You will have to figure out what is going to work for you, but you will be more relaxed when you return from your vacation.  Often we find ourselves just the opposite.  We can barely wait to return to work “so we can relax”!  Enjoy your summer, but be practical when it comes to your daily routine and vacations.

QUOTE TO CONSIDER

THOUGHTFUL GEM

"You can take a vacation in your mind

anytime you choose!"